acts as protection for the terrified soul is both an armor against the world and it’s a protection for what’s inside.” While drifting in and out of consciousness since my early twenties, despite myself I managed to compile hundreds upon hundreds of pages of text, documenting everything from my childhood memories in short stories to keeping daily journals of my adulthood to writing down and analyzing my dreams to endlessly drafting Syzygy: Crossing the Bridge to Self, all the while unwittingly creating a backup of my life.
Episodic and spontaneous, my writings seemed at times aimless. I kept forgetting where I was going! Mostly just bare bones, the skeleton of my life hid under my bed, often haunting me, discouraging me, and mocking my so-called destiny to one day publish a roadmap to my authenticity, a roadmap that I hoped might one day help others like me to find their way.
But now, nearly 20 years after I began tapping the keyboard, it’s all starting to make sense as I edit, rewrite, fill in the blanks, and edit some more, adding flesh and blood and skin and guts to those otherwise bereft bones.
To organize my metamorphosis from egg to humanoid, I’ve divided the bulk of my work into nine parts and further subdivided those parts into 34 chapters. I introduce each part with a quote, mostly from Marion Woodman, and each chapter with excerpts from my dream journal or excerpts from fairytales, songs, or poems.
In addition to the works of Marion Woodman and Clarissa Pinkola Estés, Charlotte Brontë’s Jane Eyre and Hans Christian Andersen’s The Storks, and a song I learned at summer camp, “I Found a Peanut,” and Adrienne Rich’s “Diving into the Wreck,” to name just a few, each, in their own voice, spoke to me as I drew parallels from their work to my life.
These quotes and excerpts connected my seemingly petty little individual experiences to the great big amazing experiences of all mankind. They exemplified how archetypal images throughout world literature were sometimes spitting images of what I perceived as my itty-bitty thoughts, my dreams, my fears, my hopes. Oftentimes they attempted to awaken me, to guide me, or to warn me. But best of all, they told me I was not alone. ♂ ♀